Long haul plane travel with small children is dreadful. Let's not beat around the bush. There is nothing good about the actual travel part. It is means to an end - the end being travel, wonderful new experiences, visiting friends and family. It's worth it, I think, but it's still dreadful!
The best case scenario is a baby or toddler who will happily sleep on the plane (in which case, a night flight is the way to go), or who is content to sit relatively still, with stickers, colouring, movies and the like as entertainment. Many children are like this - I have heard from friends with incredibly easygoing toddlers who literally watched Peppa Pig for 8 hours straight, with the odd pause to snack.
My children aren't like this - Tabitha is a wriggly worm Class A. She's never sat still through a movie at home - she likes to potter around, dancing and fetching dolls as she watches. Zachary has been crawling from 4 months and has never stopped going since! So clearly, I need to plan ahead.
I have always maintained that ages 12 months to 2.5 years are a International Travel No-Go Zone. That is, if it can possibly be avoided, long haul travel for that 18 months is a bad idea. Of course, this is a gross generalisation, and I'm sure there are kids out there who will travel just fine in that age range. I just haven't met any!
With this in mind, we were keen to get a big overseas trip in before Zach turned one. Zach is 7.5 months, Tabitha is 3. Babies under 1 are relatively easy to distract, tend to sleep easily in new or strange places (wrapped up in a carrier or with a mouth full of breast). Toddlers over 2.5 / 3 have far greater language and comprehension, and can (sometimes) be reasoned with. They are also hopefully toilet trained, and capable of walking reasonable distances on their own.
I mentioned night flights - truly, this is the path of least resistance. If you can spend the majority of the trip asleep (or at least, your child can), you have far fewer hours in which to provide entertainment.
Most babies will sleep fairly easily on a plane. In the past, I (and other parents I've travelled with and alongside) have put the baby to sleep in carriers, wraps and slings, or on the breast or bottle, or by walking-and-patting. The baby then either sleeps on the parent, or is carefully (and perhaps riskily!) transferred to a plane bassinet (if one is available, and if the baby fits in it, and if the baby will have a bar of it whatsoever - mine don't).
While the baby is awake, he or she can be entertained by scrunchy paper, new shiny toys, a rusk or snack, babbling to her parents or the passenger in the seat behind. It can be tedious, but it is perfectly manageable. If you have easy-going flight attendants (luck of the drawer) your baby can possibly crawl up the aisle with you every now and then, or sit and play on the floor at your feet if you have a bassinet seat (which has a little more foot room than regular seats).
If you happen to be flying business or first class, and therefore have a flat (or nearly flat) bed, you can hopefully just pop the baby on the breast or snuggle him to sleep, and both get a reasonable night of sleep.
Moving onto toddler sleep. If you are travelling in the 12m - 2.5 year age gap I mentioned (The Mummy's Avoid-at-all-Costs-Flight-Zone), my thoughts are with you. It might be tricky, as your munchkin is thrilled and stimulated by the new environment, break to normal bedtimes, new faces trying to chat and engage etc. All you can do is your best. Try to follow the bedtime routine - PJ on, night nappy or toilet, brush teeth, milk, a few bedtime stories and then perhaps some quiet guided meditation with either parent ("focus on your feet. Think about how much they have walked today. Feel the toes getting very sleepy. Feel your feet getting tired and still" etc, for possibly an hour, until sleep appears - yours or theirs!)
Do prepare your child for the trip - talk them through what will happen on the plane. Discuss what their meal might contain. Practice laying still. Let them bring a favourite stuffed toy. Perhaps introduce some 'portable' elements to their bedtime routine in the weeks or months leading up to the trip (for example, a hand and foot massage with a lavender oil or balm). Try some calming music or an audio book with headphones.
It may be possible to bring your car seat with you on the plane. Many sources recommend this, as your child may be used to (and happy with) sitting for prolonged periods of time in their car seat, and it can be more supportive for sleeping than a regular seat for small children. You will need to contact your airline, and it will depend on the type of car seat you have. Also, bear in mind that once the seat is installed on the plane, you are stuck with it for the entire trip - you can't decide to stash it in the overhead lockers if it's not working out.
Certainly bring an extra squishy pillow, comfy clothes, a snuggly toy, warm socks, perhaps a favourite lightweight blanket, and likewise pack light clothes in case your child feels hot.
Speaking of clothes - pack plenty of spare, for the baby or child and for yourself. Long-time readers of the blog may recall our flight to America when Tabitha was 10 months old. She developed a stomach flu a few hours into the flight, and spent the rest of the flight to LA (and the 5 hour stopover in LA, and the 5 hour flight to Boston) with a 40 degree fever, vomiting non-stop. From this I have learned two things: firstly, pack lots of clothes, wipes, plastic bags. Now add some more. Certainly a full box of wipes. You might not need them all, but if you do, you had better hope you have them! Secondly, it takes a lot to deter The Daddy and myself from international travel. Many (either made of weaker stuff than us, or else eminently more sensible, depending on how you view things) would have sworn off travel with children forever after that trip.
Apart from clothes, you will need an ample supply of nappies, wipes, smell-proof bags for nappies, a lightly padded change mat (those airplane change tables are rock hard), bibs, a small tub of nappy balm (pick one which can double as a lip balm or salve for dry skin, such as CJs
On the opposite end of stomach flu, we have eating and drinking. Many children (and adults) become dehydrated on long flights. Remember to drink plenty of water yourself, of course, but you might also need to remind and encourage your toddler or small child to drink as well. I recommend bringing along their own familiar drink bottle - bring it empty (darn liquid and travel laws), then fill it up on board or once through security clearance, buying bottled water and decanting it into your child's water bottle. Remind them often to drink.
Snacks and meals tend to be plentiful and regular on long haul flights. If you have a child who eats properly, and happily eats the same food as you day-to-day, it might be tempting to turn your nose up at the children's meals offered on flights, and request a regular meal. After all, you don't order from the nuggets-and-chips kiddie meals at restaurants. I urge you to reconsider, and request the kiddie meal on the plane. It comes out first (meaning that you can help them with their food if necessary, and they don't get hungry and ratty waiting), and it is includes a couple of fun treats that (if you are like us) aren't things they regularly eat, so the novelty adds to the entertainment. If you are travelling with a baby, it might be worth ordering a 'special' meal for either yourself or your adult companion (such as a vegetarian meal, low fat etc). This is because the special meals come out earlier, giving one of you a chance to eat your meal first, while the other adult holds the baby, then vice versa.
How about baby meals? Infants under the age of two, who have not purchased a seat, can order a baby meal. This differs between airlines, however generally includes some pureed and / or steamed veggies, meat and fruit. You can try requesting a children's meal for your baby - we have always done so in the past when Tabitha was under 2, and the airlines always accommodated this request, providing her with her own children's meal instead of the standard infant meal. If you are doing Baby Led Weaning, the children's meal is possibly a better choice for your baby.
Speaking of BLW - we all know it can be messy, these clever self-feeding babies! Obviously, you don't want to have to sit in a seat covered in tomato puree and chewed up meat-and-veggies, dropped from eager baby hands, for the rest of your journey. You could certainly try only offering your baby milk for the flight - nothing wrong with that at all - but most babies will protest once they see food, and demand their own. I suggest packing your own food for a BLW baby - some sandwiches, perhaps some salad veggies, some cheese, things like that. You can also use a bunny rug to cover yourself and the seat while your little one eats on your lap. Cleaning up messy hands and faces can be done with baby wipes, of course, but I think that a proper wet facecloth does the job better, so consider bringing a couple of them in a snaplock bag, to wet and use as required (you could even get a cheap pack of them from the supermarket and dispose of them along the way).
Of course, if your baby is puree-fed, it’s probably
a good idea to bring jars or pouches of food for him. The infant meals on airlines vary wildly and are incredibly
unpredictable. They might include
pouches of organic puree, with a rusk, some water and perhaps some
applesauce. Then again, they might
not have anything pureed. Then
again, they might completely forget to provide your infant meal (it happens) so
you really want to be prepared if your baby doesn’t eat regular food yet. You can bring a stash of those
pouch-foods, just show them at security, as long as they are properly sealed
they do not count towards your
liquids limit!
How about snacks for toddlers and small children? Honestly, the airlines tend to bring out a reasonable amount of food. Main meals, a few snacks, sometimes a pre-bed treat such as a Magnum ice cream or a hot chocolate. Often pieces of fruit are available too, either offered or on request. You can generally ask for other snacks, such as nuts, confectionary, museli bars etc. Something about flying also seems to decrease the appetite for most people - perhaps the lack of movement and exertion, combined with increased pressure? So you might find you're just fine without extra snacks. But it certainly wouldn't hurt to throw in some of your own fruit, museli bars or a sandwich, particularly if you happen to have a fussy eater. As I mentioned earlier, it is a good idea to bring your child's water bottle from home, and fill it up once you have passed security or boarded the flight.
If you think you will really struggle to get your child to drink enough water on the flight, consider some fun straws (those bendy straws are awesome for toddlers), or even a little juice mixed in. I know, I know - but hydration is really important on flights and changing timezones. Dehydration leads to all sorts of unpleasantness including irritability and constipation. On that note - our lovely GP suggested administering lactulose in a low dose each day on the trip, to Tabitha. We anticipate there will be a lot more refined carbs than usual (croissants, baguettes, cake...) and possible dehydration from the flights, so we want to prevent any possible constipation for her. She's suffered from it before (not enough water was the cause) and it's so distressing and stressful for everyone. If you think this could be a problem for your child, chat to your GP before you go.
Moving on to activities and entertainment. The Big Topic for flying with kids. Maximum entertainment with minimum carry-on luggage (bearing in mind that your carry-ons will already contain ample changes of clothes, baby wipes etc, right? Right?).
The obvious first choice is an iPad or similar portable media player. Load it to the hilt with movies, television shows, interactive games and apps, and picture books (this is an underrated part of the iPad - you can load up all your favourite picture books!). Purchase some kid-friendly headphones (which prevent the volume reaching damaging levels for delicate little ears). Let them go for it - it's hard to silence the Sensible Parent voice in your brain, "too much television!" but don't listen to it. It's just one day, and if movies and games work, brilliant.
You will need other entertainment, however. There are a good 20 minutes on either end of the flight where all electronic devices must be switched off, and, of course, you want to try to give those little eyes a rest from the screen. Also, if your child is like ours, they simply might not be happy to sit and watch the screen for any prolonged stretches of time!
Here are my entertainment tips and ideas:
- Pipe cleaners. They weigh nothing, take up no space, and can be thrown in the bin once everyone is bored of them. You can bend and twist them into all sorts of fun things - little dolls, flowers, animals, jewellery.
- Drawing paper and crayons (obvious choice, but worth mentioning). You can draw pictures of all the things you are going to see on the holiday, too, which is really helpful for small children, who struggle with the concept sometimes - that is, where they are going to sleep, where they will sit and eat their breakfast in the morning etc. can all be explained with crayons and a story.
- Stickers. Then some more stickers. I don't know what magical powers stickers possess, but give Tabitha a sheet of good-quality, raised and thick stickers (such as a sheet of dozens of little shiny cakes and lollies or animals) and she will stare at them for aaaaages. Comparing them, peeling one off, finding a matching one, choosing her favourite. I have packed about 10 large sheets, to be pulled out one at a time, every couple of hours.
- Sticker activity books. These are often found at the bookstores at airports, actually. They are large thin books, containing several pages of themed stickers, and 'scenes' on which to place them. They are generally themed along a specific character, such as Peppa Pig. Small children will need help with these, generally.
- Colouring in books. You could even make your own by printing sheets off the internet - perhaps related to your trip? Ditto for mazes, find-a-word etc. for older children.
- Magnetic dressup dolls. These are great fun, though the sets can be a little heavy.
- Lego or Nanoblocks
- Small cars
- Small dolls - a family of dolls house dolls might be a good thing to tuck into the carryon. Tabitha loves 'talking' these dolls to each other for ages.
- Some eye spy / scavenger hunt cards (possibly with pictures for small children). Choose a bunch of things you would expect to find on a plane, such as a hat, someone in a red top, a bottle of water, a newspaper etc. You could also play the game with the online magazine (an animal, a woman with brown hair, the letter P etc).
- Do you know Daiso? It is a chain of Japanese stores where everything costs $2.80 (cheaper in Japan and the US, by the way, not that I'm bitter...). If you have one near you, pay a visit without your child/ren, and fill your little basket up! If you don't have a Daiso, you can try a newsagent or $2 store, but seriously, Daiso is brilliant and superior. I bought stickers, erasers shaped like (startlingly realistic) cakes, biscuits and fruit, erasers shaped like animals and characters, notebooks of shiny, picture-covered drawing paper, pens with fruit-scented ink, pencils with a stack of rainbow leads (which you swap by pulling out the bottom one and inserting it back into the top), a little pinwheel, some miniature containers, sheets of origami paper, nail-art crystals (yikes, but if I get desperate...), some little dolls, a couple of toy cars. Produce them one at a time, spaced throughout the flight. If you can be bothered, wrap each one in paper and let your child 'lucky dip' every hour or half hour. If each of these toys takes up 5 - 30 minutes of your child's interest, you will be a good way towards providing entertainment for the whole trip, if combined with some movie watching.
- If your child gets bored with the Daiso toys by the end of the flight, don't just throw them in the bin. Put them in a cute bag and gift them to a random family you see at the airport, checking in or boarding a flight. You might just have given them an additional hour or so of sanity!
How about getting around the airport? From checkin, through security and customs, to the gate. From the gate to the car. With a mountain of luggage. Your best choice is a carrier. A good woven wrap is almost always my carrier of choice - it is the most comfortable and supportive of all carriers. You can wear your baby or toddler on your front or your back. Most babies and toddlers will nap in a wrap. A wrap can also double as a pillow or blanket on the plane. A wrap can be scrunched up and stuffed into the front pocket of a carryon.
The only disadvantage of a wrap is that it is not super easy to put on. Yes, if you are used to it, you can wrap your baby onto yourself in less time than it takes to open a basic pram. However, if you don't have someone else to hold your baby while you wrap (your travel companion, for example, might be wrangling other children or carrying luggage), you will need to lay your baby on the ground or a chair. Not ideal, particularly in a situation where there are loads of people and cases rushing past.
"Why would you have to unwrap your precious little sleeping angel?" I hear you ask. Good question. Bad answer. Most security screening officers will make you remove them to pass through the metal detectors. Yes, even if they are sleeping. Yes, even if your wrap is simply a single piece of woven fabric without any metal. Yes, you may want to attack them in anger. It's no use - they are allowed to use their discretion, and if they ask you to unwrap your baby, you will have to. Maddeningly, there are no laws around this - I've been informed by one supervisor that you do not have to remove your baby from a carrier, however most will ask you to do so. It's incredibly frustrating. I'm going to stop now, lest I enter a rant that reaches a thousand words. You will also have to remove your (possibly sleeping) baby from a carrier or wrap once on the plane, for takeoff and landing - any time the seatbelt sign is on. Again, so frustrating, because unwrapping a sleeping baby may cause them to cry and scream, which is not what anyone wants on a plane. It is also annoying because the baby seems much safer and more secure in a carrier, rather than a flimsy, loose lap-belt attached to your lap. The reason relates to being able to quickly release the child in the event of an accident, but I would hazard a guess that injuries are much more likely from poorly restrained babies and children, in the event of extreme turbulence, than by being 'stuck' to an adult in a crash.
So, I love a wrap, but appreciate the convenience of a quick buckle-on soft structured carrier (such as an Ergo or Manduca). What to do? I take both. Neither are particularly bulky, both can be stuffed into the front pocket of a carryon suitcase. If the baby is going to be in the carrier for any length of time, I use the wrap, or if we are needing to get the baby in and out quickly (security clearance) we use the Manduca. This is the way we always travel, and it works well. Also, The Daddy prefers a buckle carrier to the wrap, so it's handy to have both.
What about a stroller? If your child is heavier, or prefers to nap in a stroller, you might find this a good choice (or a stroller in combination with a wrap). Generally for international travel (and sometimes domestic) you can gate-check your stroller. That is, you can take it right up to the gate, then hand it over when you are boarding, and they put it in a separate part of the plane. There are even some strollers which fold up compactly enough to take on as carryon luggage, because they fit in the overhead lockers (Quinny Zapp Xtra with Folding Seat or Quicksmart or a few others). We are taking an umbrella stroller (a Maclaren Quest), which we will gate-check, for Tabitha. We also bought a brilliant universal scooter board, a Bumprider, for use while overseas, which will allow us to have Zachary in the stroller, and Tabitha riding along on the scooter board. I would absolutely love to take our regular pram (a convertible single-to-double Bugaboo Donkey), however it is just too bulky to warrant taking with us, particularly as we are taking a few flights and trains within Europe during the trip. It would also mean that our luggage would not fit into a hire car or chauffeured car for transfers. So an umbrella stroller, scooter board, wrap and Manduca are our chosen methods of child transport for this trip!
There you go. Travelling and carryon with little people. If I have time, I'll write something about the rest of our packing. Departure is around 48 hours away!
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